Sunday, August 3

Tribute

"This is the worst function in the world!" -- person at work looking at some tangled/broken code.

This bought into my mind the song "Tribute" by Tenacious D.

...
[spoken]
It was the longest and most tangled function in the world... Tribute.

Long time ago, when that guy still worked here,
he was coding down a short and urgent deadline.
All of a sudden, there shined a shiny demon... in the middle... of the function.
And it said:
[sung]
"Write the worst code in the world, or I'll eat your soul."
[spoken]
Well that guy, he look at the screen,
and then he said... "Okay."
[sung]
And he coded the first thing that come into his head,
Just so happened to be,
The Worst function in the World, it was The Worst Function in the World.

Look into my eyes and it's easy to see
One and one make One-Zero, One-Zero and One-Zero make One-Zero-Zero.
It was binary.
Once every hundred-thousand lines or so,
When the power does cycle and the screen doth glow
And the keyboard doth click...

Needless to say, the boss was stunned.
Whip-crack went his schwumpy tail,
And the beast was done.
He asked him: "(snort) Be you hackers?"
And he said, "Nay. We are but men."
Rock!
Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah,
Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh!

This is not the Worst Function in the World, no.
This is just a tribute song.
Couldn't remember The Worst Function in the world, no, no.
This is a tribute, oh, to that Worst Function in the world,
All right! It was the Worst Function in the World,
All right! It was the most tangled function, the worst function in the world.
[spoken]
And the peculiar thing is this my friends:
the function he wrote on that fatefull night, it didn't actually run, and was not
anything like this song.
[sung]
This is just a tribute! You gotta believe me!
And I wish you never knew! Just a matter of opinion,
Ah, fuck! Good God, God livn',
So surprised to find you can't stop it.

All right! All right!


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